Missing the dead and gone

My Mom seems quite old to me now. I talked to her on the phone yesterday, then thinking about the conversation later I thought, “I should call Mom…” and I saw the image of the younger Mom I thought I should call

This, thinking of calling and seeing the picture from the past, happened in the blink of an eye but I held on to it because it seemed significant

In a while I started thinking that the younger version of Mom that came up had died a long time ago… she’s gone. I’ll never talk to her again, never ask her what she thinks about this or that or watch her in the kitchen

The boy who knew her is gone too. All the brothers and sisters, friends and neighbors too… dead and gone. I can call or visit the latest versions of them but it’s strange because there always seems to be something missing. Like we’re all drying up

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